My painting skills amaze even me these days. A terrific likeness don’t you think? I’m going to put it next to my bed. Well, if I had a bed. I’ll just stick it in the room that I usually use.

Gordon and I are seeing a lot of each other lately. Not as much as I’d like, but there’s no way I’m going to have my first woohoo with this gorgeous man in the same bed that Cannon Fodder & Agnus are wearing out. *shudder*

I don’t believe it! I’ve been kicked out of the gang! Just because I tried to pocket some extra cash for myself. How was I supposed to know it was marked? I just needed some extra money. The crazies go through so much food it’s… well, crazy!

I don’t know what happened. I could hear Charlie and Lilly beating each other up as usual, and the next thing Cannon Fodder is blubbering and screaming that Lilly’s dead! Charlie’s looking pretty guilty though, the little creep.

There was no way I was letting her go without a fight though.

“Please! You have to bring her back! Do you have any idea what it’ll be like if we lose another bed and chair! Have mercy on me!”

Noooo! Why did he have to make me pick which hand he had her soul in? I suck at that game!

The shortage of beds is causing some people to resort to drastic measures.

The middle of the kitchen is getting to be a pretty popular spot for napping.

Would you believe that Cannon Fodder just forgot to eat? I’d just ordered food that day and made a huge pile of hamburgers. But no, he was too busy playing with a skunk that he’d found outside. Of course, after that the idiot was too busy having a long shower to eat. He died just a few steps from a big plate of hamburgers.

Oddly I was the only one who seemed to care about Cannon Fodder’s death. Well, actually I didn’t care so much about him as the bed and chair I was about to lose.

“Please! We can’t take another loss like this! People are sleeping standing up and I think I’m addicted to coffee!”

That sneaky Grim Reaper tried the old shell game trick on me again and my luck with that game still hadn’t improved. Sorry Cannon Fodder. I’m going to miss your bed and chair.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the next Olympic sport: Synchronised Bawling.

Agnus seems to be taking Cannon’s death quite badly. I mean, she was always crazy, but now she’s joined the Friends of Inanimate Objects Club.

Luckily, I have my own methods of distracting myself from the disappointment of losing yet another bed and chair.